Freedom is a length of rope.

 Squamous cell carcinoma. That what Gabe has. It's a very aggressive form of oral cancer. Since his mouth is most likely not healing based on his symptoms he only has a couple weeks to live tops. 

We are picking up some pain meds for him when they are ready next week, and will be keeping him comfortable. We'll take him in to the vet after the first of the month (that's when we can) and at that time we plan to let him go. 

He's had a good life, and been a wonderful friend. He's a sweet, loving and amazing cat and I will miss him terribly. I'm glad I got to know him these 9 years I have. 

He's getting basically whatever he wants of these next couple of weeks. Chicken nugget bites, ice cream bites, to sit in the computer chair, to wake me up in the middle of the night for cuddles. He's on a strictly soft food diet which he is absolutely loving. 

I'll be putting hard kibble back out all the time next week but he stays on his soft food diet for the rest of his time here, so he gets tons of protein and isn't hungry or doesn't feel like he has to eat kibble with his sore mouth. My other cat keeps getting hungry without the kibble being out all the time I think. 

I'm going to miss Gabe a lot. 

 Finally almost caught up with the Marvel films! I only have Captain Marvel, Avengers:Endgame, and Spiderman Far from Home left to watch. I love the films but got way behind and never got caught up. it's taken me months but I have watched every single one in order. The AMAZING thing is I have avoided all spoilers this entire time. I haven't done any searches on favorite characters, have avoided conversations, commercials, memes, everything possible so I could be surprised by all the films. Only a little longer! I'll probably watch Captain Marvel tomorrow night or Wednesday depending on D&D and then Endgame Thursday. 

Still playing a lot of games. I have several Resident Evil games to play now as well. Have the very first one in a remastered version on PC to try out. I want to play them all in order. 

The state of the world is still totally stressing me out and I am doing everything possible not to think about it. 

Gabe has his surgery Thursday. It should go fine but still a little anxiety making. 

 Got my hair done! It's green again and I love it! It's got to grow some more to be in the exact style I want but it's a cute earish length bob right now and I love it. 

I was thinking pink for the Supernatural convention in November but I think I'm gonna keep this dark forest green. I really like it. Hopefully it will be grown out to more the style I want by then. I have 4 months. 

The world has been insane, and now Trump is coming to my city. I hate it and wish he wasn't coming here. It's embarrassing how people are acting, already lining up to see him and he doesn't even get here until tomorrow and his event is Saturday. He's just gross. I disagree with everything about him. 

So there's that. 

Other than that I've just been watching tons of Planet Zoo videos and tutorials and sketching out what I want my zoo to look like. It's gonna look really cool! 

 This last week has been surreal. I've watched a lot of news for someone who doesn't have access to cable or basic TV at all. I've seen TV footage of tear gas and pepper bullets being used in my own town, which I never even thought about happening here. 

It's been a stressful week. 

Saw the doctor Tuesday. My blood work looks good and she's glad I am losing weight. I do have Plantar Facsiitis in my right foot, which is causing the pain I am dealing with. It is really painful. She basically recommended better shoes, ice and anti-inflammatory drugs. She gave me a script for an anti-inflammatory that is once a day and I have noticed it helps but it makes me feel kind of dizzy so I've only taken it a couple times. Friends have been suggesting stretches. I ordered shoes. I was able to get two pair since they were having a sale, so if one pair doesn't work the other should. Plus both were nice. 

One pair is pink and navy blue and the other is black and pink. I got walking shoes, they didn't have any running shoes I liked. The reviews on both pairs talked about how supportive they are and how people wear them to work who are on their feet all day, so hopefully. Plus one had a recommendation on a list of shoes specifically for Plantar Facsiitis. They are called Sky walking shoes by a company called Ryka. I had never heard of the company before but they seem to make a lot of wide width shoes. The other pair are also by Ryka and are the Dash 3 walking shoe. I'll try to remember to post pictures or something. 

Still playing a lot of Planet Zoo and Animal Crossing. It's good to keep the mind occupied. I'm almost done with Career mode on Planet Zoo. Then I am going to go into Sandbox mode and learn how to build before I try franchise mode. 

So off to play I think. 

 Broke down and bought Planet Zoo. It was on sale and I have wanted it forever. 

The entertainment value was worth it. 

I am working my way through the careers, which is basically the tutorial levels. I am not on the level where you build your own zoo from scratch, meeting goals to get a gold star rating. So, so many things went wrong. First my American Bison escaped, and it took forever to capture them and put them back as I figured out how to do it, mainly because I panicked and couldn't remember how the tutorial said to do it. Then the zoo started tanking money wise. My wolf enclosure failed and all the wolves got out and I had no money to build their enclosure back up. I thought about just giving up on the whole thing since I was 8900 in the hole but I thought no, no there has to be a way to fix this. So I boxed up every animal in the place and put them in storage. I closed all the concession stands. I fired everyone but a caretaker. And waited. People will come to the zoo even when there's nothing in Planet Zoo. It took forever but I got right side up. I then put in two Bison. And waited. I now have a somewhat thriving zoo with American Bison, a Grizzly Bear, Tundra Wolves, Peacocks, and Aldabra Tortoises. It took forever. The zoo is ugly as sin but functional. I'll work on learning to make them pretty later. 

I got all my new clothes from Torrid and I have to say leggings are a game changer for me. How have I never worn these before? I accidentally dried one of the new shirts in the dryer I shouldn't have, but other than that everything is still nice. In love with leggings and I look much more put together than I did in those sweats that were three sizes too big. 

Also have some new perfume from a place call A Kawaii Boutique on etsy. They're based on characters from Supernatural. One is called Baby in a Trenchcoat and one is called Son of a Bitch. I'm wearing the latter today. They're very good. Strong but not too strong and all the notes work well together. He has a couple more I want so I plan on making more purchases. Plus he makes body scrub and lotion!

I'm in a good mood today, a little chatty due to the Excedrin migraine I took for this week long migraine I've had. I'm ready for quarantine to be over. It's driving me insane. I'm wanting to go places again. We are going out tomorrow so I can get some hair dye. I'm just ready for this to be over so I can go get a cup on coffee or something. I have a feeling that's a long ways down the road....

Dungeons and Dragons night went pretty well. We had several encounters with various monsters including the following.

Hook Horror (although these ended up being afraid of us and we didn't have to fight them)

Xorn (Although we didn't fight these, they ended up not being hostile, so we just snuck past.)

Piercer

Roper (these gave us a run for our money)

The encounters went well, and although we had to call the game early I feel like everyone had a good time. 

Not much else really happened today. I finally finished my antibiotics for my tooth and I am glad, I thought I was never gonna finish those things! 

Waiting on my doctor to fill some prescriptions for me and they certainly are waiting until the last minute. So that's stressful. 

I've been having a lot of fun playing Animal Crossing. It's actually really relaxing, and I enjoy the fact that time passes based on real world time. I was afraid that aspect might frustrate me, but I actually like it. I never feel hurried or stressed that something needs to be done quickly.

I have my house, and I am able to travel now. So I got to visit my friend today! She lives in the Netherlands and we've been wanting to play some games together. Having yet to be able to organize a Minecraft game together, we got together and played Animal Crossing! It was fun to see her island and house. She is super far ahead of me, but shared some things and I now have coconut trees and apple trees! I also have Yellow Tulips. I need to figure out how to make them spread because I only have one so far.

In other news I am making "Vegetarian Fish" that Gardien makes. It's really good. I know, what's the point of being vegetarian if you just eat meat substitutes? LOL I like them though, I think it's a texture thing.

I might be coming down with a cold. It's not Covid I don't think because it's settling into my sinuses and a sore throat and not my chest. I am feeling pretty rough. Hopefully I get some good rest tonight.

 My Nintendo Switch Lite arrive today. It's really nice. I got the coral, and it's a lovely pink color. Matches my keyboard, headset and mouse very nicely, which was the point of it. Been playing Animal Crossing most of the evening. 

The case I have has a lovely blue universe design on it. 

Animal Crossing is very entertaining. The characters are cute, and the game is relaxing. Just gathering, crafting and building. I like how eventually the island will look how I want it to. I plan on having a house with a large yard and lots of hybrid flowers. I like the black roses, but probably will go with pink. I'm not sure yet. I've got a lot of exploring to do. I set my ten up near a waterfall and I think that is where I want my house. The sound is very soothing when playing the game, and it's great for fishing. 

I'm not sure what other games I will get yet, I figure I will look next month for another one. I might get Pokemon Sword. It looks nice. 

We had some lovely chocolate cake tonight. It was vegan, gluten free and dairy free but you couldn't tell. I can't have dairy so often times the other two just come along with getting dairy free. The frosting was amazing. 

Storms are rolling in. It's that time of year here. Places are predicted to have nickle sized hail. 

 I watched Frankenstein, the stage production tonight, starring Benedict Cumberbatch and Jonny Lee Miller. It was superb! I plan to rewatch so I can see the version where Miller plays Frankenstein's monster.  I would say even if you usually are not big on watching plays or stage productions, give it a try. It has a lot of action and movements as the actors are very dynamic. It stays true to the story and spirit of the book and is just beautifully done. Highly recommend. 

I spent the rest of the evening a bit more lightheartedly as that was a dark two hours, so I watched Crack videos mostly. 

I lost 2 pounds last week! Very pleased with my progress on weight watchers. So far I have lost 12 pounds. It's going slowly but that is the healthy way, so I am OK with that. 

Also pleased with my vegetarian diet. We had Indian food for dinner and I got Spinach Pakora. It's one of my favorite things. Spinach basically quick fried in a light pakora batter. There isn't much batter on it and the spinach itself gets kind of krispy. It's delicious!

Off for bed now. I'm not super sleepy but hopefully will catch a bit of sleep. 

 Oak is a treasure. I am a forgetful person. Very forgetful. One of the medications I take makes me forget everything. So playing Dungeons and Dragons can be challenging as, well, there are names, places and people with unusual names that you have to remember and I often forget them. I made my character adorable, and tiny, and forgetful. 

Tonight I forgot something, but it just turned out as incredibly funny and not at all annoying and made me love the people I play DnD with a whole lot. 

Oak also bought a toad. For 4 copper. I need to name said toad. I had no intention of buying a toad, but she did. So now my character has a little pet, and a map of Faerun, because she plans to travel a lot. As in vacation travel, she is done with adventures. 

Did I mention I am trying CBD oil? So far it is helping with my chronic pain, and seems to help with my ADD as well. I concentrated much better on game tonight. It also helps with my anxiety and I slept much better last night. My hope is my quality of sleep will go up so the quantity can go now. Right now I require around 11 hours to be rested. I would prefer that to go back to about 9 hours. I know some of it is medication related, but I really dislike sleeping so much. 

Tomorrow I am going to watch Benedict Cumberbatch in Frankenstein. It's available for a weeks' time on YouTube,  It is the play directed by Danny Boyle. Jonny Lee Millers version of Frankenstein is also available to watch for a full week. The way I understand it is they took turns playing Dr. Frankenstein and the monster in the production. If I am remembering correctly. So I intend to watch both of them. 

Off to try to get some sleep! I have a Creation event tomorrow to watch on StageIt. Adam Fergus and David Hadyn-Jones from Supernatural are doing an event.